These days it’s hard pressed to find me at a bar that isn’t 4100 in Silver Lake. The drinks are cheap, there’s a film photo booth, and it’s big enough that everyone can get in no problem. That also means, plenty of strangers. There will always be, no doubt, a group of people standing together talking who don’t know each other.
I was on a walk with a friend yesterday and I kept saying my disease was “not being able to sit in the silence”.
When I get the sense that someone is uncomfortable, or the room isn’t “vibing”, I make it my mission to get the conversational ball rolling. In simpler terms: I am, at my core, a monkey crashing cymbals.
So this became my go-to question: If you were on death row (political, sorry) for killing people, like a lot of people, and you get a last meal of your choosing from anywhere, anytime, WHAT WOULD IT BE?
Without a doubt, when I ask this question the person freaks out. Not because they’ve hypothetically murdered people (like, a lot of people) but because of the finality of a simple question.
What would your last meal be?
And when I ask, I get specific. I won’t settle for “a hamburger and fries”. I wanna know how it’s cooked. I wanna know what kind of fries. I wanna know what hole in the wall in Brussels or wherever the fuck it’s from. I love this question because more than just telling me people’s favorite food, it tells me about them. And usually, there’s a nostalgic element, that opens them up to me in a way that I wouldn’t have heard if I had just asked “SO WHAT DO YOU DO FOR WORK??”.
This is my sneaky little way of getting closer to people, and crashing my little monkey cymbals not as loudly, but just as effectively.
I know you’re dying to hear mine1. So here it is:
DRINK
For the sake of being concise (who me?), I will just say an alcoholic beverage. Sometimes I ask for non alcoholic as well.
My drink would be the Celery Cocktail from Republique. Yes, I know I worked at that hellscape for a year as a host and hated every second, but that celery cocktail is unlike anything I’ve ever had. It is spicy, refreshing, and tastes like…. well… celery! Which I love. Call me a freak, but I like a cocktail that tastes like a green juice. Also it was the cocktail I had at my graduation dinner at Republique, a restaurant that was my favorite during college… until it wasn’t.
APPETIZER
Had to pull out my travel log for this one. Hummus and Pita from Shlomo and Doron. We had this hummus on the second to last day of Birthright in Tel Aviv in the Shuk Carmel and it was holy as the land it was being eaten in. It was creamy, airy, zesty, and topped with some sort of meat… never did find out what kind. I also remember Doron (son and chef) being really cute and sending us an extra hummus for free. As a Jew, loved that!
MAIN
This is tough (as if someone is forcing me to make this list)! Alison Roman’s shallot pasta made in my kitchen with my best girls. There is nothing more sacred to me than cooking with my gals, sharing a bottle of wine, and gabbing. No one makes me laugh harder, and the unbridled joy I feel paired with a salt-y shallot-y sauce… you can’t beat that! Also, I think they would make me feel a lot better about killing all of those people. As would the pasta.
DESSERT
A Chocolate Blizzard with extra Peanut Butter Cups from Dairy Queen. This answer is layered, much like a blizzard itself. First of all, chocolate dessert is a necessity. A dessert without chocolate, to me, is a faux pas. And Reeses Peanut Butter Cups are actually crack cocaine, I don’t know how they’re FDA approved. I could eat them until my mouth is chalky and my hands are glued together with melted milk chocolate. And then, there’s the nostalgia. Growing up this was my go to order, and a trip to Dairy Queen with my sisters after a Sunday night dinner was tradition. The blizzard was always too big to finish (petite), and would melt onto my hands in the car on the way home. So I always left half in the freezer, only to never finish it and subsequently throw it out in time for the next Sunday trip to DQ. In this situation, of course, I would finish the whole damn thing.
Yes this list is eclectic and unless this prison was run by the Kardashians, it would be physically and fiscally impossible to achieve. But that’s the point of this! I also hope no one is planning on killing people! Like a LOT of people! Anyway, if you’re ever at a party or a bar and feel like you need to start an inclusive conversation, ask this question. A certified hit, coming from the monkey with the cymbals.
xoxo
Lucy
Disclaimer: the meals can change! so if you ask me this in 2 months, I could’ve eaten something that blows my brain out of my skull and makes the list instead of hummus I had like, 4 years ago.